Spoon Full of Ava

  • millymill | January 19, 2017

    Kids are not Robots

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    Children are smaller versions of us. I don’t mean they turn out like us, even though more times than not they do. I mean they are just like adults with mood swings, their own personalities, their own thought process, the list goes on and on. When my daughter first started showing me her Terrible Two’s Tantrums I was not trying to hear anything she had to say because I thought “I am the parent. You are the child. You will do what I say and I don’t want to hear it!”

    I started observing her behavior and her reactions to different situations. I came to realize sometimes her attitude comes from missing a nap. Sometimes she is preoccupied with something that she feels is important and to me it didn’t seem important so it was an issue. I am talking and she is focused on this “important” task. Routine and schedule is really important to me as it is to her. I didn’t realize a lot of this until a few weeks ago.

    Personally it’s important to be to not just parent like my parents or through advice. I like to do my own research and really get to the core of how to communicate with our kids. Each child is different because as adults we all have our own, individual personalities. They are the same!!! The scary thing about our older daughter is her personality reminds me so much of my own. Her attitude, her independence, her determination, and unfortunately she is stubborn just like I.

    Once you study your child and really understand the way they are wired and work life becomes so much easier. It’s easier to talk to them and avoid tantrums or attitudes. Our daughter will understand and accept anything if you explain it to her. For example; today she wanted tortilla chips. I gave her a hand full and as she was eating them she was hysterically asking for more. I told her “No, that’s all!” she started whining until I said “there’s no more left”. The whole mood changed within seconds, she said “Oh! There’s no more?” That was the end of it because she understood why I said no. Communication is important in every relationship, no matter the age.

    Something to keep in mind these little babies are growing up. They are turning into little humans and they need to be strong, smart, kind, healthy, and over all good people. When we try and shut them down because it’s not our way(not talking about wrong or right) we are stopping their growth, their development and their independence. I am constantly going back and forth within myself on disciplining, letting her grow, and making sure she is not spoiled.

    Kids are not robots and are not meant to be controlled as such. They are a kit, they come with their own pieces and tools. It is up to us, the parents, to teach them how to be put together and the best version of them. It is not our job to create them into who we think they need to be. That’s God’s job. Our job is to raise them, support them, love them, guide them, build them up, and instill good morals and values.


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  • millymill | December 27, 2016

    Confession of my Wrong Doing.

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    I’d like to think I have it all together when it comes to being a wife, mom, employee, etc. Wouldn’t everyone like to think that? Well, even though I’d like to think I do in all reality I do not!

    There are days where I am counting down minutes until my kids get to sleep. Then that time comes and goes and they are still not sleep. That’s when the not so put together me comes out. Especially now that my older one likes to ask for lotion, soup, diaper change, another story, to talk about her behavior(any means necessary), and anything else that comes to mind. That’s when I literally run out the room and close the door behind me or scream my head off until she’s in bed and under her blanket. (WRONG)

    When someone cries the right thing to do is usually talk to them about why they are crying. Hugging someone that is crying is usually the norm. Well, why is it when my daughter cries I tell her to cut it out? Usually if I am exhausted and she starts crying for no good reason my response is “Cut it out!” or “Why are you crying?”(knowing she can’t answer it). (WRONG on so many levels)

    How many of us like to hear “Told ya!!”? Not I! What in the world makes me think my child wants to hear that when she bumps into the cabinet after I told her it was going to happen? At that moment she needs me to hug her and tell her it’s ok and she’s ok.

    There are times where my kids miss a nap because I decided to stay somewhere longer than I should have. What makes me think it’s okay to be frustrated with them when it’s my doing that they are upset and cranky. Same goes for me dragging out their lunch/dinner time because I felt the need to finish cleaning first.

    It doesn’t make it ok and may not even be right but when I am wrong i apologize to my kids. Whether they understand my apology or not I will continue to do so. Eventually they will grow up and know that it is Okay to apologize and admit when you are wrong. Now, I am working on fixing my wrongs and that is also a lesson. An apology means nothing unless you do something about the actions you are apologizing for.

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  • millymill | July 22, 2016

    Brutal Truth about having a Newborn

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    My “Newborn” is 5 weeks now and I’ve noticed a lot of things this time around that I didn’t with my first.

    Now, before I get into the dirt remember I am OBSESSED with my kids! Love them to death and I’d like to believe I take very good care of them(Don’t all parents think that?). I just have to be honest that it is not all sprinkles and unicorns. Not at all!

    It’s OK to not want to hold your baby as soon as they pull him/her out.

    Both of my girls were pretty disgusting when they tried to put her on me and make me hold her. Both times I asked them to clean her off first. They are covered in all types of bodily fluids and sometimes will even poop/pee on you right out the womb.

    Sorry to be the one to break it to you but 90% of newborns  are creepy looking.

    If your baby is super chunky and soft then maybe they are a part of the 10%. Most look like little aliens with cone heads, swollen eyes, and these tiny little bodies. In a few days they will become a little cuter and cuter as the time goes on. A lot of times you don’t realize how creepy they looked until they are cute so don’t worry.

    It’s not Love at First Sight

    I hear/read people say “I fell in love with my baby as soon as I saw him/her”. How?!?!?! It is a complete stranger that just popped out of you. Yes it’s YOUR stranger, YOUR child but there is no bond there yet. The relationship is just like any other it takes time to build. The child and the mother have to get to know one another.

    The first thought I had with both my kids is “They are my responsibility”, “I have to raise these babies to be well mannered, behaved, respectful, smart little girls”. Each day I fall in love with them more and more but I didn’t feel it right off the bat.

    (Breastfeeding Moms) Cluster Feeds!!!

    I don’t think formula fed babies do this but I am not sure. Breastfed babies will find a time  during the day to cluster feed. Usually at night from 5,6 to 8,9 they will want to leach onto your breast none stop. It’s nice at first (bonding time) but once reality sets in that you have to take care of another child, dinner, home and bedtime well forget about it! It is the most annoying thing in the world. The baby is NOT hungry but is basically storing food/milk IN CASE we decide not to feed him/her at night.

    Night Time Feeds

    Most newborns wake up a few times a night to breastfeed because it digests much quicker than formula. Well, the first few nights it’s nice and you want to cuddle and spend time with your baby but after a while… You turn into a zombie/robot that automatically hops out of bed and goes to feed the baby.

    Now, the brutal truth about this is I am not sure if as parents we get up to feed the baby, to hurry up and get to him/her before they start hollering at the top of their lungs, or we hurry in to feed them to get it over with and go back to bed.

    The Middle of the Night Cry

    Of course first we try to change, feed, hold the baby but when none of that works what happens? Don’t forget you are sleepy as heck and just want to calm the baby down and go back to sleep.

    It’s the most frustrating/annoying sound you could hear. All your rules get thrown out of the window and all of the sudden co-sleeping is the best choice. Even rocking doesn’t seem to bad!


    Once again I repeat I love, love, love my daughters. I enjoy being a mother more than anything else. At the same time I am not blind and am still a human who is very honest. Being a parent is the most rewarding job one can ever have but just like anything else it has it’s ups and downs.

    If you have the brutal truth about your newborn to share, feel free to do so in the comments.

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  • millymill | May 26, 2016

    The Uncontrollable Kid at the Playground

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    On the Slide in our yard.

    On the Slide in our yard.

    All of our children enjoy going to the park to swing, slide, go across the monkey bars, etc. We enjoy watching them play and get excited to see other kids that they have formed friendships with. Sounds like sunshine and rainbows, no?

    No! I personally hate taking my daughter to the park because some kids are jerks and their parents just don’t pay them any mind. I follow my daughter around at the park to make sure she doesn’t fall, or get into something she has no business getting in(bigger slides, monkey bars, etc). She’s only 2 by the way. I also have to watch the kids who’s parents are too busy yapping away and sitting on the bench. I watch those kids to make sure they don’t push anyone, or are mean to anyone ESPECIALLY my kid.

    What made me start watching these kids? That’s what you’re thinking right? Well, a few weeks ago we went to the park and being as though my kid is only 2 she is still very careful and takes her time because I tell her too and I am sure she doesn’t want to fall. Well this little JERK tried shoving her out of the way by/on the slide. So, I had to step in and check him that ONE i see him and  TWO I will not allow him to push her or any other kid. When I went to look and see where or who his mother/father/nanny was I saw no one close enough paying attention to him. He looked at me like I was crazy, I guess they don’t discipline him at home. It’s not his fault because he probably doesn’t know better but his mama better not be mad when other parents are disciplining her child.

    Another incident was a boy running around trying to spit at other kids. He had to be around four and his mama was sitting on the bench playing on her phone. She had no clue what he was doing until I loudly told my daughter to stay away from kids like him because he just doesn’t know better and spitting in disgusting. His mama looked up saw him and went back to her phone. Well, that explains his behavior!

    I will continue to correct these kids one way or another. If you don’t like it then make sure you discipline your children at home. What goes on inside pours out into the streets.

    Now, if for some reason my daughter was acting up, pushing, being mean, spitting, etc and I wasn’t around… I really hope that someone would be there to Check Her and correct her. I totally get it if you have 2-3 kids and are at the park trying to attend to one kid while the are two are going nuts. Well, we have to work as a team and help one another out.

    Don’t like it? Keep your kid at home away from other kids who have sense and are corrected right away by their parents when they aren’t doing what they should be.

    -Annoyed Mama

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