Spoon Full of Ava

  • millymill | July 22, 2016

    Brutal Truth about having a Newborn

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    My “Newborn” is 5 weeks now and I’ve noticed a lot of things this time around that I didn’t with my first.

    Now, before I get into the dirt remember I am OBSESSED with my kids! Love them to death and I’d like to believe I take very good care of them(Don’t all parents think that?). I just have to be honest that it is not all sprinkles and unicorns. Not at all!

    It’s OK to not want to hold your baby as soon as they pull him/her out.

    Both of my girls were pretty disgusting when they tried to put her on me and make me hold her. Both times I asked them to clean her off first. They are covered in all types of bodily fluids and sometimes will even poop/pee on you right out the womb.

    Sorry to be the one to break it to you but 90% of newborns  are creepy looking.

    If your baby is super chunky and soft then maybe they are a part of the 10%. Most look like little aliens with cone heads, swollen eyes, and these tiny little bodies. In a few days they will become a little cuter and cuter as the time goes on. A lot of times you don’t realize how creepy they looked until they are cute so don’t worry.

    It’s not Love at First Sight

    I hear/read people say “I fell in love with my baby as soon as I saw him/her”. How?!?!?! It is a complete stranger that just popped out of you. Yes it’s YOUR stranger, YOUR child but there is no bond there yet. The relationship is just like any other it takes time to build. The child and the mother have to get to know one another.

    The first thought I had with both my kids is “They are my responsibility”, “I have to raise these babies to be well mannered, behaved, respectful, smart little girls”. Each day I fall in love with them more and more but I didn’t feel it right off the bat.

    (Breastfeeding Moms) Cluster Feeds!!!

    I don’t think formula fed babies do this but I am not sure. Breastfed babies will find a time  during the day to cluster feed. Usually at night from 5,6 to 8,9 they will want to leach onto your breast none stop. It’s nice at first (bonding time) but once reality sets in that you have to take care of another child, dinner, home and bedtime well forget about it! It is the most annoying thing in the world. The baby is NOT hungry but is basically storing food/milk IN CASE we decide not to feed him/her at night.

    Night Time Feeds

    Most newborns wake up a few times a night to breastfeed because it digests much quicker than formula. Well, the first few nights it’s nice and you want to cuddle and spend time with your baby but after a while… You turn into a zombie/robot that automatically hops out of bed and goes to feed the baby.

    Now, the brutal truth about this is I am not sure if as parents we get up to feed the baby, to hurry up and get to him/her before they start hollering at the top of their lungs, or we hurry in to feed them to get it over with and go back to bed.

    The Middle of the Night Cry

    Of course first we try to change, feed, hold the baby but when none of that works what happens? Don’t forget you are sleepy as heck and just want to calm the baby down and go back to sleep.

    It’s the most frustrating/annoying sound you could hear. All your rules get thrown out of the window and all of the sudden co-sleeping is the best choice. Even rocking doesn’t seem to bad!


    Once again I repeat I love, love, love my daughters. I enjoy being a mother more than anything else. At the same time I am not blind and am still a human who is very honest. Being a parent is the most rewarding job one can ever have but just like anything else it has it’s ups and downs.

    If you have the brutal truth about your newborn to share, feel free to do so in the comments.

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  • millymill | May 26, 2016

    The Uncontrollable Kid at the Playground

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    On the Slide in our yard.

    On the Slide in our yard.

    All of our children enjoy going to the park to swing, slide, go across the monkey bars, etc. We enjoy watching them play and get excited to see other kids that they have formed friendships with. Sounds like sunshine and rainbows, no?

    No! I personally hate taking my daughter to the park because some kids are jerks and their parents just don’t pay them any mind. I follow my daughter around at the park to make sure she doesn’t fall, or get into something she has no business getting in(bigger slides, monkey bars, etc). She’s only 2 by the way. I also have to watch the kids who’s parents are too busy yapping away and sitting on the bench. I watch those kids to make sure they don’t push anyone, or are mean to anyone ESPECIALLY my kid.

    What made me start watching these kids? That’s what you’re thinking right? Well, a few weeks ago we went to the park and being as though my kid is only 2 she is still very careful and takes her time because I tell her too and I am sure she doesn’t want to fall. Well this little JERK tried shoving her out of the way by/on the slide. So, I had to step in and check him that ONE i see him and  TWO I will not allow him to push her or any other kid. When I went to look and see where or who his mother/father/nanny was I saw no one close enough paying attention to him. He looked at me like I was crazy, I guess they don’t discipline him at home. It’s not his fault because he probably doesn’t know better but his mama better not be mad when other parents are disciplining her child.

    Another incident was a boy running around trying to spit at other kids. He had to be around four and his mama was sitting on the bench playing on her phone. She had no clue what he was doing until I loudly told my daughter to stay away from kids like him because he just doesn’t know better and spitting in disgusting. His mama looked up saw him and went back to her phone. Well, that explains his behavior!

    I will continue to correct these kids one way or another. If you don’t like it then make sure you discipline your children at home. What goes on inside pours out into the streets.

    Now, if for some reason my daughter was acting up, pushing, being mean, spitting, etc and I wasn’t around… I really hope that someone would be there to Check Her and correct her. I totally get it if you have 2-3 kids and are at the park trying to attend to one kid while the are two are going nuts. Well, we have to work as a team and help one another out.

    Don’t like it? Keep your kid at home away from other kids who have sense and are corrected right away by their parents when they aren’t doing what they should be.

    -Annoyed Mama

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  • millymill | March 15, 2016

    Mommy Tantrums

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    My daughter is my world! She has been such a good child since the day we brought her home. Every transition has been so smooth and without a glitch. Now, we are creeping up on her Birthday and I am not going to lie. Everyday has not been easy or smooth but each night I am grateful and we are happy. Let’s just step into one of very few tantrum days.

    This last weekend was rough on our schedule. Saturday we went to my cousin’s house for dinner and to hang out so I made Ava miss her nap. at night she was exhausted to a point where she didn’t even want to try to go to sleep and she is a sleeper! Loves her naps, bedtime, relaxing, etc. She was hysterical, cried about everything, her teddy lost his shoe and she cried. I went to turn the water on and she cried. I was just as tired from the ride, hungry, and just wanted to lay down. When mom and baby are both cranky that right there is a recipe for disaster. Finally I washed her and got her in bed through tears a story and about 10 hugs.

    It was our luck that at 2 am the time changed and we lost an hour of sleep. I am very anal with her schedule so I had to get her up and ready. Up until her nap she was an angel. While she went to the park and played with her dad I tried to move her clothes and all her stuff into her new bedroom. When she walked in her eyes, hand, mind was all over the place. She was excited and wanted to try things on, look around for where things were being put, etc. Everytime I said it was time for her nap she would say “Patom”(means later in Russian). We don’t do much negotiating when it comes to eating and sleeping. I was not feeling that response.

    Just like her I was tired and needed a nap and was hungry but I still had so much left to do on this Sunday that all I could think about was getting her to sleep. I began to get frustrated with her as she cried and was hysterical just because she didn’t know whether she was tired or wanted to play.Not to mention the entire time she was just hugging me and not letting me lay her down. Any other time I can hug her for hours, lay with her and read to her but my mind was else where. I just wanted to get everything done and have sometime to relax but it was just becoming further and further from reality. I ended up yelling at her telling her to lay down and cut the crying out. I rarely yell at her in such a way so I think it scared her and she started crying even worse yet still hugging me.

    At that point I was defeated! I just felt terrible because my house work, her closet and all the other junk wasn’t going anywhere. Yet my soon to be two year old won’t need me forever and the few minutes/hours that she wants me to hug her and play by her rules I should! I just got emotional and cried right along with her while she hugged me and we rocked back and forth on her chair until we were both OK. I talked to her and apologized for yelling and explained to her my frustration and then she agreed to go to sleep.

    I strongly believe parents and kids go through these stages together. For that moment I was having a temper tantrum because time was out of my hands. I was losing control of my schedule for that half an hour and my mind/body just couldn’t handle it. Those moments teach us and mold us into better parents. It’s okay to sit down and cry with your baby sometimes. It’s ok to skip house work to spend some time with people you love.

    Mommies it’s ok! We will feel guilty. We will be exhausted. We will skip story time and that’s OK. Let’s leave it here…tell me about a time you’ve had a time where you both had tempter tantrums at the same time.

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  • millymill | March 11, 2016

    Mom Shaming

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    For the first time in 2 years a mother TRIED to mom-shame me. I can promise you she regrets it now but it doesn’t change how she pissed me off for a slight second.

    My daughter is having some sort of an eczema reaction(in my opinion), we will be going to a dr to get it checked out. Being as though it’s late after speaking to a nurse I posted a photo in a Facebook mommy group and you wouldn’t believe the comments that started rolling in. The photo is literally of my daughter’s arm pit and maybe a 3rd of my nail. The photo is very cropped so it’s literally nothing else that you see.

    Well, a lot of moms were giving their opinions on what it could be. Which is what I asked for and was totally okay with what they thought or had to say. I am very well aware that most moms are not doctors and will not know what it is. I wanted to hear from moms that have seen this on their own children. Ofcourse some of these “opinions” were on another level but it comes with the territory and I just ignored what I didn’t care about.

    Now! Here comes this “fabulous”, “perfect”, “new mom” that says “well obviously this mom is more concerned about getting her nails done than taking care of her child.” Lord have mercy! First and foremost you can’t even tell if my nails are freshly done or have been on for 3 months. (They are a little over a week old) Second, IF I didn’t care for my child I wouldn’t ask what it was and probably just spend my days normally while my daughter had a reaction to something. I started to explain myself to this girl and quickly deleted it because I don’t need to explain myself to anyone.

    We all care for ourselves and our children differently than the next mom. I do not believe I am better than a mom who is in sweats, not working, and doesn’t have her nails done. I don’t think I am better because I still try to take care of myself. I do think we all have choices to prioritize our selves along with our children. I have noticed a lot of moms who have given up taking care of themselves try to talk down to moms that do take care of themselves. Then this girl says “oh great you rather work than care for your own child. I decided to stay home and breastfeed.” Little does she know my daughter was breastfed until she was a year old. All while I kept a full time job and took care of myself and my wifely duties. Who am I to tell her I am better? From doing some snooping her daughter is no more than 6 months old and she’s not married. Then she says “I see how happy your family is! Your profile picture is of just you.” That made me giggle, I pray for girls to find the happiness that I have. I pray girls like her get to experience love from their families like I have. I pray this girl gets out of the negative state of mind as fast as she can.

    I ended up removing the picture because it was 5 am and I refused to go back and forth with a “Facebook Gangster” when I have to be up for work in a few hours. I write this post to all moms! If you care about your child and you care about your parenting then you are already a great parent. We all have our own ways and our own paths. If I walk my path in heels and you walk yours in slippers it doesn’t mean I am better or you are better. It means that we have different parenting styles, goals, plans. It does not change the amount of love and care we have for our kids.

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